Correction

In my post yesterday, I said that today would be eight months since my grandpa became an angel, but I was thinking about it today, and it's actually seven months. It seems like so much longer. R.I.P. Grumpy. I LOVE YOU!

SCHOOL TIME

Sorry it's been so long since I've checked in! Lots has been going on. specifically school stuff. Every other day, I have college classes for two hours, then two hours of high school. The other two days of the week, I just have the two hours of school. Although art is not one of my classes, the art teacher said I can hang out in there and use the materials anytime I want, which is cool, especially since I have some cool friends in there.
I've been spending a lot of time writing essays between scholarships, English IV and college Composition, and now I have to do one for Psychology. Somehow, this one seems to be the hardest, even though I just have to write about myself. I don't know why, but I can write more about my parents and my family's history than I  can about my dreams and future goals.
The seniors went to a college fair yesterday, but it was really small, and not nearly as exciting as I expected it to be. Though I DID get some free pens, so I guess that's good.
Uh...what else? It'll be eight months tomorrow since Grumpy (my grandpa) died, which seems surreal. What I wouldn't give to hug him and hear his voice one more time. To tell him that I'm majoring in Studio Art, partly because of his support my whole life of anything creative. How could I describe how much I miss him and his mom, who died 7 years ago? Where does the time go?
It seems like you never get to really know your classmates until you're a senior. And yes, I know I'm jumping around, but that's just how my brain works. It keeps hitting me that this is my last year with this group of people, which is scary, sad, and somehow exciting at the same time. Not because I don't like them, but because I like meeting new people and having new experiences. Hard to believe that after I walk down the gym, get my diploma, shake hands and hug teachers, and flip my tassel, this chapter of my life will officially be over. A new one will come, and I know I have more power to write it than ever before. I'm becoming who I'm gonna be. Not that I won't change. But nothing that I've been through has been a mistake. It's made me who I am. All the bad times, hard times, everything, has made me into the person- almost adult, yet still somehow childish- that I'm meant to be.
So go write your story, remember that you can change your own destiny, and live and love on.
 Ciao, loves
           XOXO

A month later..

Sorry, folks. Didn't mean to be gone for an entire month. Well, a bit has happened in the last month. I finally got my license, as did my friend. This month is our cruise, and we start our senior year in the beginning of August. Uh, we're going to court this week for stuff having to do with my grandpa's estate, so wish us luck. Also, I've been doing some college stuff off and on..when I feel like it. I know this is short, but I'm sorry. I can't come up with much more. So later. :D

Summer time..

  Well, I've actually been doing things lately, which is why I haven't been on in a while. My friend and I - along with her sisters and some others- are going to be volunteering at the library every Wednesday afternoon for a kids summer reading program. It lasts until July, and last week, which was the first week, there was a magician. Even I was slightly transfixed...until I had to watch the act a second time as the second, older, group of kids came in.
  Also, I went to my school's baseball fields to see my friends that I hadn't seen in forever. Their brother was playing baseball, but we all just hung out. It was so good to see them after all this time. I think I got a bit of a sunburn, but mainly huge blisters on my feet since we walked from the fields to the little store in town. Don't walk in flip-flops..especially when they're hard and have no support, because you might as well not have worn any. I know it's gross, so this will be the last I say of it, but seriously, half of my foot is a blister. Anywho, I'll let you know if anything else happens.
   
                     Ciao loves,
                                 XO

I'm home!

     Well, folks, I got home from Arkansas yesterday afternoon, and since there were so many tornado and storm warnings around here, I was watching that and trying to relax at the same time--which is not the best way to do it, considering the storms were insane and very worrisome. Any who, we're fine and you can't even tell it stormed here. Now, who wants to hear about Arkansas? If you're reading this, I guess you have no choice :)
    So, we went up to Arkansas last Saturday and two extra people were with us- my mom and my other friend's mom. And let me tell you, get our moms and my friend's mom and grandparents together,  and you never know the stories you'll hear, especially about yourself. They're just as bad as my two friends and myself, except that we don't tell stories about ourselves--usually. So the first day, we didn't do much. Just relaxed and had dinner at the condo. The next day we went to Dogwood Canyon, which is this amazing nature park and took some Senior pictures.
   Had we not stopped to take so many, we might've gotten to the end--it's three miles each way to a big waterfall--but we didn't. It made for some great pictures, but it was really hot and we were in jeans, so it was slightly less enjoyable. That day, my mom and my friend's mom went home. The next day, we went to downtown Eureka Springs and shopped and walked and walked some more. I got some purple hair dye, which is now in the ends of my hair and looks awesome!
   If you're keeping track, we're now onto Tuesday, when we drove around and took even more Senior pictures in fields, and by old trucks, which also resulted in bad allergies and bug bites. But hey, the pics are going to be super original, and some are so pretty, so it was worth it. Wednesday, we went to Silver Dollar City, which was fun, but also tiring, seeing as all I did was walk around. One of those days we also shopped in Branson, but I can't remember which day. Thursday we were going to go to White Water, but it was storming, so we went back to Branson and my friend got a tat and we shopped some more afterwards. I got henna, which unfortunately has completely faded.
    And then we came home yesterday. I realize that some of this doesn't sound very fun and that it's really rather boring to read, but hang in there, would you? Trips like this have been happening for years -minus the Senior pics of course- but this year is different, because who knows when we'll be able to do it again, what with college coming up and all? So yes, during this time it kept hitting me that it might be the last year, that we're graduating, and that I may not see these girls that much after graduation. But it also goes to show that no matter what we've been through or will go through in the future, we will always be there for each other. And that's something that I know won't change, no matter how old we get or how far apart we are, because we'll make it work. You can't be this close for this long, and throw it all away because you're moving away, going to college, meeting new people, and don't know when you'll see each other again. That's how I am with lots of people, though, not just them. So many of my friends are going in different directions, but we'll make it work. Some will still be in high school, but it'll last, if they're willing to work as much as I am to keep our friendships strong. Anyhow, thanks for listening.
                                 Ciao loves,
                                            XO

The greatest man to ever live

    Okay, these pictures are of me and my wonderful grandpa. I drew this in art as a surprise for him. The only thing is that he never got to see it. He died February 26, 2013, when no one was home. They think he died in his sleep, which would be the best way, especially since he was always falling asleep. This man's love and tenderness can in no way be portrayed by pictures or even words. He was always so supportive of every single thing I did. Especially my art. He'd always ask when I was gonna draw him something else for his wall. And anytime anyone came in, he'd brag about it. I'm not in any way bragging about my art, and though these aren't the best angles of the pics, you get an idea of how it looks.
     What I'm saying is this: there are only three people in my immediate family that have ever been super supportive of my art (Don't get me wrong, everyone's supportive of it.) But never did more people show it off than him and my parents. I don't know what I'd have done without his support and their continuing support. It's because of them that my skill has developed into what it is today, and why I've chosen to major in Studio Art in college. I only wish he'd lived long enough to see me graduate from high school. Oh, I know he'll still see it, just from above, where I can't hug him until the day I go to be with all my family and friends there.
     My grandpa, or Grumpy, as we called him (something my cousin started even though he was never actually grumpy) was certainly one of a kind. Don't picture a little frail old man, because he wasn't. He was 6 foot tall, and he used to be over 200 pounds. Towards the end of his life, he'd lost about a hundred, because he never wanted to eat anything; nothing sounded good to him. I never realized how drastic the change was until I saw some old pictures of him. But you know the standard "back in my day," stories? He had those. And almost every time we were at his house, he'd ask if we'd seen Lonesome Dove, and almost every time, Shawshank Redemption would be on, and we'd  watch it. Well, as much as a person who constantly falls asleep can watch it, anyway.
     I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything for you. My grandpa wasn't like that, so I won't represent him like he was. He was one of the most real people I've ever met. He'd do anything for anyone, even if it ended up coming back to bite him. Maybe that's why my mom and I  are the same way. When my mom was little, my grandpa worked a lot, so she was home with her brother and mom. When my mom was 16, her mom was murdered. Some time after that, she and my grandpa became so much closer. They'd talk on the phone almost every single night, and would always end by saying 'love you.'
     My mom is a musician,, singer, and songwriter on top of being a social worker and therapist. So in honor of him, she's going to write a song (with my help) called, "Daddy's Calls." Since he will never get to hear her finished CD, and everything she worked on for it, she has even more incentive to finish it. Since he never got to see my drawing, it was on display at his funeral. Since we're doing the headstone pretty soon, I was wanting to look into getting the picture engraved onto it.
    Sorry that I keep jumping back and forth; I'm just typing what comes to me at the time.
     I was his youngest grandchild. By birth anyway. My cousin is with a woman who has twin 6 year olds, a 13 year old, and a baby with him, so Grumpy had another set of grandchildren - well, they'd be his great-grandchildren actually. But as I was saying, I was/am the youngest, and I think the closest to him. So sometime (hopefully) soon, I'm getting a tattoo in honor of him. It's going to be in his handwriting from the last birthday card from him, which wasn't long before he died. He signed it as : "Love you
        Grump"
     So it's going to be on my side by my heart, to always have him close to it. I don't think I'll put everything he wrote on me, because it was this: "to the best granddaughter a grandfather could have," and that would be too much. But that card, and that sentiment pretty much describes our relationship. I'm trying so hard this very second not to burst into tears, knowing he'll never see my Senior pictures, see me graduate, do well in college, or get married. But I know he'll still get to experience it, and he'll be with me every step of the way. And I'll always hold him in my heart.

In three days....

     I will be headed to Arkansas with friends and a little bit of family. See, my friends' grandparents and mom take another friend and myself on vacation every summer for the past several years. But this year will be different. Not only are we going later than we normally do - we usually leave the day school's out- but we're also taking our Senior pictures. Did I mention that her grandparents own and operate a local photography business? And that they're amazing?! Her family is basically like my family. I even call them the same thing she does. As for our other friend, she's just as much family as any of us.
      But because we're getting our pictures taken, my friend's mom and my mom will be going with us, just for a day, to see us get them done, and to spend some time together. Now, before I move on, let me say this: all three of our moms are just as close as the three of us are, and I'm slightly scared of what they'll pull. (Just kidding) So this vacation will be extra special, not only because our moms will all be there, her grandparents, and we're getting pictures done, but also because it's the last time it will happen before we graduate. So, as excited as I am for the trip, it represents something else--the end of high school and the beginning of moving away--and I'm not sure how to feel about that.
      These girls are two of my very best friends, and we'd all do anything for the others. Sure, we fight. But that's because we might as well be sisters, and so we fight the same way. So what's the point here?
      This summer will be one to remember. Big trips, big plans, and big big changes coming up. I couldn't imagine better people to spend it with, or to consider my "chosen" family. So yes, we may grow up, and away from each other. But what we have, this friendship, this bond, will last beyond that. (Or at least I pray it will.) So, I won't be able to put much on here when I'm there, because there's no WiFi. Maybe I'll do a little on my phone. But I promise you, I'll tell you all about it when I get back.
                Ciao loves,
                            XO